An orchid purchased today at the Farmers' Market

Good Day, God!

Actually, it is BEING home that is glorious. The home could use a little help. This gorgeous orchid is still in the box it came in because I have been out all day.

I can only say THANK YOU, GOD that I am retired. I hate to think how tired I’d be if I had outside responsibilities. Today, after the Farmers’ Market, I went off with Kit to his band concert.

This was a joint concert with the Omiya Wind Symphony from Japan.

The combined community bands of Omiya, Japan and Honolulu

We left at 11:00 a.m. for a 2:00 p.m. concert so I took lunch, water bottle, books, and my iPhone and iPad. I munched on lunch while both bands rehearsed. The music was marvelous! And when the concert ended there were, of course, photo ops. The Japanese had brought signs, flags and even a beach towel with the islands of Hawaii on it. All taped up or held up. Fun!

Kit proceeded to come down with a cold right afterwards and sneezed all the way home. So we skipped the post-concert joint dinner. Arriving home at 6:00 p.m. Kit went to bed and I went to play scrabble with my mom.

Sunlit clouds over my mom's retirement residence

I must say, God, that I may go back to writing my blog in the morning! In the morning my mind is clear and all is waiting alluringly ahead of me. While at the end of the day my mind and heart are FULL. Well, full is too kind. Jumbled! That is a more accurate word.

On the other hand, sitting and review my day is useful. Today was full of good things — enjoyable things — worthwhile things, even.

BUT I am LONGING for TIME HOME ALONE!  Longing for a FULL SABBATH Day.

Well? Can I PRACTICE what I philosophically and spiritually embrace? Only with Your Help, God! ONLY with Your HELP!

A bougainvillea in industrial Kakaako

Good Day, God!

When I said that I wanted to go with my loving husband, Kit, to his 9:00 a.m. audiologist appointment, I didn’t really imagine what it would involve. First we left his car off at Kyle’s Service in Kakaako for an oil change and then we walked  to Queens Physician’s Office Building I. Walking there and then back!

Now that I have admitted this, God, I know that our daughter, Suzanne, who also loves to walk, is snickering at me.  When Kit first brought it up I assumed he wanted me to follow in my car and then when he had dropped his car off for a safety check we would drive to POB I. What else would anyone do?

fountains in front of the Honolulu Hale

I wouldn’t call myself a slug, God. I like going for walks. Really. I just don’t think of walking as a mode of getting somewhere. Walks and hikes are to see the beauty all around us and enjoy nature. They aren’t to get somewhere.

However, I rallied, God. This is a “Love Gift,” I told myself. Well, actually, that is what I told Kit! I put on my running shoes and a pretty good attitude and we set off.

between an underground parking lot and the city hall

Much to the surprise of my “Stick-in-the-mud” self I loved the walks. The public buildings and public lands in downtown Honolulu are lovely. Being outside with green rolling lawns and bright blue skies is a treat. And I took lots of pictures.

Dang! I was just hit with the thought that Kit isn’t the only one that offers me opportunities that I initially dismiss. You do that do.

You are longing to pull me out of my stuckness and into Your Greater Out-of-Doors. Thank You!

a small but brilliant cactus blossom

Good Day, God!

It’s fun to look at photos of blossoms that only bloom for a day. Catching those blooms — freezing them in Time — lets me really look at them. Now I’m marveling at all the diverse time spans underway on our Planet, God.

Sequoias live for thousands of years and mayflies for just 24-72 hours. (Although mayflies do live for around two years as nymphs down at the bottom of a lake.) I’m not sure about mayflies but Sequoias have been around for 200 million years. Sequoias, now that’s a species built to last!

a sequoia in Sequoia National Park

And, then there’s us, God. If there was a lifespan continuum from Sequoia to Mayfly we humans would be closer to the Sequoias. But, I just don’t think our species is good for 200 million years. This makes me dizzy, God. I don’t do numbers well. Or, maybe it’s Time that I don’t do well.

I have a friend who does do Time well. She’s a planner. And when it comes to doing “hard things” she thinks “If I do this today, my tomorrow will be better.” I don’t need to tell You, God, that this is a brand new thought for me. I love that thought! I want to think that way.

Yesterday I resolved to cancel this morning’s standing walk with a friend AND an evening committee obligation. The first one was a fun thing. The second was a “duty” thing. In both cases canceling was a difficult thing for me to do. Forgoing fun is hard and it is harder yet to “shirk my duty.” But, I hadn’t slept well for a couple of night. And I knew that I couldn’t do all that I had planned to do — without a significant cost to myself.

Hmm. So planning must include planning what not to do . . . not just what to do. That’s another new thought! Thank You, God, for New Thoughts!

The Aloha Tower on the Honolulu Waterfront

Good Day, God!

I love water — love the ocean — and I particularly enjoy eating a meal while looking at the water. That was my hope this morning, God, as I drove off to the waterfront.

The last time I had gone to the Aloha Marketplace, it was bustling with busy shops and people happily strolling around. Sigh. Not so, today, God. Most shops were closed with For Lease signs on them. The restaurant we were going to was only open for dinner. And, there was not a tourist in sight. Not any local folks there either.

I know the economy is BAD, God. But I’ve been down in Waikiki and it seemed to be doing fairly well. This lovely spot overlooking the harbor is a disaster. It is geared to cruise ships and they are few and far between right now. The whole property has been “For Sale” for several months. But, I wonder if anyone can do much without the ships coming in.

We are all so interconnected God! Trouble in one part of the globe affects us all. But, we live on the East end of Oahu and life is good out here. So, I only had an intellectual understanding of the recession. And that’s pretty close to No Understanding.

I suspect I am not alone, God. In history class we all found it appalling when Queen Marie Antoinette of France suggested that the peasants rioting for bread should “eat cake.” Alas, God, people at the top have always failed to “understand” the realities at the bottom.

Even just this small dose of “awareness” has been sobering. Please, God, open our Hearts!

The Secret Garden by Frances Hodgson Burnett

Good Day, God!

I was chatting with our Hawaii Kai librarian this morning and shared that I had read the Secret Garden over Christmas. She brightened and said what a timeless classic it was. I agreed and then I said “It’s a Transformational Book.

That’s a good word for it, God. The book does show how we can — after all our temper tantrums and fits — open ourselves to Your Transformational Power. In the book the characters referred to the Transformational Power as “magic” and “fresh air” and being “outdoors.” But, I give You the credit.

I love knowing that we CAN change. That knowledge opens the door to HOPE. And, it takes hope just to imagine there could be a better future. It takes hope — and a lot of hard work — to take even one small step forward.

This is close to my heart, God, because I, myself, am undergoing a transformation of sorts.  Or perhaps it is more of a “recovery.” Here’s an example. This morning in my jewelry making class I introduced myself to 3 of the new class members and one of my class member from last semester. Then I realized: Last semester I didn’t learn a single person’s name. YIKES! Talk about being on Overload!

Yet, I just didn’t realize HOW depleted I was. My Emotional Self was not just TIRED, she was grumpy, irritable and depressed. But, The Conscious Me wasn’t willing to hear any of that. So, now I’m recording a daily voice memo on my iPhone. I’m just talking about what’s going on inside me and around me. Then I play it back. Wow! I HEAR how I FEEL! I hear my full range of Emotional Tones – something I can’t do when I’m talking.

So, Thank You, God. Thank You for hearing me — and, now, thank You for helping me to hear myself. It’s a step!

The Lion's Head in a Lion Dance celebrating Chinese New Years

Good Day, God!

And a very good day it was — complete with a colorful and noisy Lion Dance at my Rotary lunch-time meeting. Noise is an important part of the dance — the idea being to scare away evil spirits at the start of the New Year. To “ensure” good fortune for the coming year the audience “feeds” the lion money — in red envelopes or just plan bills.

What tickled me was what fun people had for their money. To be sure, God, it wasn’t much money. But it was a lot fun. And part of me said, YES! That is what life is about! Make things fun! Make a game out of things.

There have been a number of books out recently that talk about how captivating games are. Good games involve ascending levels of challenge so that one can push toward ever more mastery. These games make it clear when you fail a level. The feedback is immediate.

Ah, but there is one special component, God: These games expect you to fail and fail repeatedly. They require persistence in the face of failure. Persistence is a wonderful “skill” or “mindset” to have for life!

When I went to school, they “labeled” children Slow, Medium and Fast. That sad thing was both the teachers and the children believed those labels. But Research has shown that without the presence of those toxic labels, very often the child who is slow to start will finish ahead of the fast child.

So what am I inching toward, God? I guess I want all of us humans to realize that failing and being slow are normal parts of our lives — that we can persist — we can keep working at things. We can grow and improve. And maybe doing that is the most fun of all.

two ducks flying home

Good Day, God!

To be sure, the birds are only small black dots on this photo — but catching birds in flight is always a treat. They were flying home just as Kit and I were driving out to celebrate his half birthday. Half-birthday observances are one of his family traditions and I enjoy it.

I am slowly getting used to the idea of having enough time for myself. It isn’t easy as it sounds. Before I could depend on “Good Deed Doing” to provide the excuse for not managing myself well.

Now, I am nose to nose with the Call to upgrade my level of Personal Responsibility. Yikes! High Time! Yes, God, part of me does say that. But then I think how fortunate I was to have been able to slip and slide by growing-up for all these years!

That is yet another “voice” inside me. Needless to say, other voices are “Tisk Tisking” at that immature attitude. It was Robert Ornstein who wrote that we are not homogenized selves — but rather an assortment of “juntas” trying to take over the national TV station. That sure feels right, God.

So, now I am tackling Calendar Control! I’m firmly resolved to do no more double booking! That will be helped when I figure out how to sync iCal on my computer, iPad and iPhone. Thank goodness I can call Apple! Too bad, God, that there isn’t a problem-solving service like that for ordinary (non-tech) problems. They would make a fortune AND help so many people!

Now I am off to bed — to curl up with Judith Kolberg’s book: ADD-Friendly ways to Organized your Life. I’ve read it before. But this time I’m going to go really slow — then review and repeat and review it again. I am very thankful, God, that I have time for myself. Please help me use it wisely.

Looking south 7 minutes after sun rise

Good Day, God!

I’m really a night owl, God. So I love it when I wake up in the dark. Ah! It is still night — I haven’t missed it.

Waking up after the sun is up just doesn’t feel right. And, because my husband Kit really is a morning lark, mostly I do wake up when it is still night time.

Finally I noticed that even when the days start getting longer, the sun is still rising later. Now, with the Star Walk app on my iPhone I have the exact figures.

On December 19, 2011, the day was 10 hours and 49 minutes long and the sun rose at 7:02 a.m. The day stayed the same length until December 26 when it lengthened by one minute to 10:50. But, meanwhile the sun was rising at 7:04, 7:05 and on December 26 at 7:06. In other words, while the days were getting longer, the sun was rising later. By January 7th the sun was rising at 7:10 and it will continue to rise at that time until January 26th when it will rise at 7:09,  beginning a progression of earlier rises.

What that all means is that in January, I pretty much walk in the dark — dark enough that I wear white. And I love it. I love watching the Light slowly fill the sky — coloring the clouds — and waking the birds. It’s a surprising, simple joy.

Hmm. Maybe the best part is that I actually noticed and investigated this prolonged period (19 days) where the sun rises at exactly the same time. Noticing means my brain isn’t filled to overflowing with To Do List activities — and worse yet, Must Do activities! I’m smiling, God. I’m retired and I’m thankful!

The view driving around Diamond Head

Good Day, God!

I’m back in my regular routine and thankful! It is a beautiful world and especially in January and February when the sun  here in Hawaii is tilted to the South. The Light seems even more glorious.

This particular view delights me every time I drive around Diamond Head. The problem is, I drive by. But today they were hanging big metal nets on the side of Diamond Head to stop — or at least slow — falling rocks. So the traffic was stopped. Voila! Photo time!

Yes, that does remind me, God, of the benefits of pausing. And that reminds me that I haven’t done my Centering Prayer Time for today. It is so easy, God, to forget about Silent Prayer. I guess Extroverts like me love TALKING prayers — Prayers with WORDS — so we know what’s going on.

But, I am beginning to accept that my Conscious Mind does not get to be privy to everything. You and my Hidden Parts have things to do — lessons to learn — comfort to receive. Of course, since I don’t get to be part of it, I don’t exactly know. But that’s my guess about what’s going on.

You know, God, if You would SHARE just a little bit of what goes on when I’m doing Centering Prayer, it would make it so much easier to remember to do it. Sigh. I’m pretty sure You just responded that AFTER I’ve done regular Centering Prayer for a while, THEN I might “catch” an image or word. Dang!

That thought might not have been from You, God. But it sure does feel right. This is an opportunity for my Conscious Mind to step aside — and try not to be in a snit about it. Oh? She can be in a snit if she likes — as long as she goes and does it!

an anthurium blossom slowly unfurling

Good Day, God!

Anthuriums are slow to grow. They start out tightly furled. In fact, when they begin I can’t really tell if the shoot will turn out to be a leaf or a flower. It takes time for it to fully unfurl. Even when shoots are fully extended they continue to stretch out and grow.

I feel very much like this anthurium, God. I certainly don’t feel fully unfurled. Indeed, I’m not even sure if I am a leaf or a flower — an unsettling thought.

I feel good about the “still growing” part, God, even though I have lived long enough to know that “growing pains” are to be expected. Painful or not, we are called to grow.

Learning is part of it. But Head Learning is only a small part of it.  Our Hearts are called to learn — called to learn compassion, called to learn to see each other as having the potential to become New Creatures.

Calvin and his transmogrifier

When I think of “becoming” I find my mind going back to Calvin and his Transmogrifer. Wouldn’t that be wonderful, God! I could sit in my prayer chair / transmogrifer  and BOINK just become a New Creature. A new improved model.

I guess that instant fix does happen to some folks — Saint Paul on the road to Damascus — folks instantly delivered from drug addictions or completely healed of terminal illnesses.

But, for me, Becoming or Unfurling is a slow business — very slow. And some days I revert to a tiny furled shoot that looks like it will be lucky to become a leaf. Sigh. No Spiritual Transmogrifiers?

Just as well, God. Because I an not a Product coming out with New Models. I am a Child. And Growth comes more from the Failing and Forgiving than from “getting IT right!”